A VERSE THAT TOUCHED MY HEART- A SIGN OF LOVE

Assalamulaiakum WarahmatuAllahi Wabarakatuh!

This is one of the ayaat that filled my eyes with tears. This makes me recognise Allah even more. subhanaAllah! Surah Ar Rum is considered as the Surah of Signs. Where Allah shows us His signs (His created signs) and asks to us reflect, understand, listen and know. 
One of the signs of Allah is this beautiful ayat in Surah Ar-Rum:

Translation: "And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought."
Allah made our spouses from our own nafs, and from our own kind, and made us into spouses, so that we seek comfort within each other. This is human nature. Any kind of weakness that we have like fear, love, affection, Allah gave us our spouses so that we obtain repose in them. Isn't this a mercy from Allah?  

 Allah said that he planted love in the hearts of spouses. Here he said مودة not محبه. because مودة has selfless love and it is exaggerated where you learn to sacrifice for your loved one and care for each other, whereas  محبه is selfish love in which you love that person only for your sake, to please yourself.  مودة is when you not only take but also give. Allah instills this love in the hearts of the spouses as a type of need. Everybody has that special kind of love for their spouses which is innate, created and instilled by Allah. 
We, human beings are weak. We have affections, feelings, mental and physical needs that we seek in from our spouses. The real purpose of marriage is to seek peace within one another, understand each other, be there for eachother in times of need. Love one another and have mercy towards each other. 
If a person doesn't find these three things (Comfort, love and mercy) in their marriage, then that marriage is lacking completeness, and it might not be considered as a happy or successful marriage. 
It is obvious that no two genders in a marriage are going to be similar or not have differences. Of course they're going to have differences amongnst eachother. What's required is to understand those differences and still love and respect eachother and love one another selflessly and unconditionally for the sake of Allah. Afterall, we do crave for attention and love from our partners. It's like a necessity within us that's just like eating and drinking. How would our lives be if there was no one to share this love with just like if there was no food to eat?
This comfort, love and mercy is not only related to spouses but also related to friends, parents and siblings. This bond can only be increased  and strengthened if these three qualities are found within us and if we are ready to give it to them. You won't find this in animals because they don't express these qualities to their own kind. They just have that physical desire that they crave. They just don't have that emotional need like us, or even if they do, they possess that selfish love and not the selfless love. If a marriage only worked on the basis of physical needs and lust, what kind of relationship is this other than the the relationship of an animal? 
Love is a feeling that makes us better people and makes us sacrifice for one another. We need to value, care, understand, respect and be merciful to our spouses and loved ones. Spread the greeting of peace (سلام) more often and reply to their greeting as well. Smile at eachother. If Allah commanded us to smile and say peace to strangers then isn't it obvious that we need to increase our greetings of salam and smiles even more amongst our loved ones? Smiling and spreading Salam only makes us a muslim and not a weirdo. Salam will be so common that the believers and angels will spread the greeting of Salaam profusely. So, to be one of the inhabitants of Jannah, we need to spread peace abundantly.

But what has marriage and relationships become these days other than hatred, lust, anger, grudges against one another? Always pointing at each other's mistakes and always expecting something in return. These kinds of marriages usually end up in divorce or result in a cold war forever. 

Du'aa:

Aren't you glad that you love someone? Isn't this love and mercy in our hearts, a sign from Allah? This love and creation of spouses from our own nafs is in itself a sign from Allah. We wouldn't have found our better half if it wasn't for Allah. We wouldn't have felt peace and expressed our love that flows inside us if we didn't have our better half. How lonely and incomplete our lives would be if we had no partner? How would our lives be if there was no love and affection? What better relationship is there other than the relationship of a husband and wife? Who put that love in your heart? Not only spouses, but who put that love, mercy and peace within our families, siblings, relatives and friends? Allah subhanahu wa taála! So wouldn't you then ponder? Wouldn't you then be grateful?

Cutest picture!

I am not married yet but the idea of love and affection is what intrigues me to get married soon. In sha Allah!
And remember whoever you are in love with, may it be your husband or family, it should only be for the sake of ALLAH! If we don't love someone for the sake of Allah then it would be a great fitna for us. It will be just like how Bani Israel loved the calf that they desired to worship other than Allah. If you love someone other than His sake, it will only turn us away from Allah and His remembrance. If that person whom you love is constantly distracting you in your Salat, forces you to disobey Allah (makes you do haram), removes you from the worship of Allah and His remembrance, then this is called worshiping a person. This love has gone way overboard and is not at all acceptable in Islam. Islam is moderate and loves moderation. We should not love anyone more than Allah or our Rasool صلى الله عليه وسلم. True love is only when your love for someone brings you closer to Allah and when you care for the wellbeing of that person's dunya and aakhirah. 
This is a great sign from Allah! But little do we ponder upon the greatest blessings we possess; love, mercy and loved ones. 

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- Manal Mirza