HOW TO SUPPLICATE (DUWA) TO ALLAH?

I was unaware of this until few years ago. I used to raise my hands and start asking Allah I want this and I need that without even praising him or following the etiquettes of Duwa. Sometimes I even used to start talking and forget that I actually have to make a duwa. But little do we realise that we aren't supposed to 'demand' Allah of what we want. 

Well, like everybody we are learning things we never knew before and its only for us to become better educated Muslims and learn the right way of Supplicating to our Rabb. 

ETIQUETTES OF SUPPLICATING:
1. Begin Supplicating with sincerity and concentration. Some of us get lost in our own little world while we are praising and supplicating to the All Mighty. Also we rush in our duwas and run off.
2. Once your sincerity is stern, start by glorifying and praising Allah. Use words like SubhanaAllah wabi Hamdihi SubhanAllahil Azeem and also laa ila haa illallah. These are the most precious words to your Rabb.   Praise Him with words such as AllahuAkbar, Alhumdulillah and SubhanAllah.

3. Send peace and Blessings upon the Prophet Muhammad Sallalahu Alaihi wa Sallam. Also end your supplication with salams on our Beloved Prophet Muhammad Sallalahu Alaihi wa Sallam.            





Narrated Faddalah ibn Ubayd (RA): that the Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: 'When anyone of you makes du'a, let him start by glorifying his Lord and praising Him, then let him send blessings upon the Prophet (SAW), then let him pray for whatever he wants'
[Abu Dawud-1481, At-Tirmidhi-3477]

4. Supplicate with sincerity of acceptance. We all are in haste of when our duwas will be accepted. Just be patience and trust Allah. Be grateful for the grievous duwas that weren't accepted. If some of your duwas aren't accepted in this Dunya, it will be accepted in the Hereafter. in sha Allah
5. Whenever you acknowledge Allah's blessings upon you, be grateful and show gratitude. Say Alhumdulillah, Alhudulillahi alaa kulli haal. 
6. Whenever you acknowledge your sins, seek forgiveness from Allah. Use His attribute names, Ar-Rahman Al Gafoor. 
7. If you seek from Him wealth then call Him Al Ganiyy. If you seek from Him health, call to Him as Ash-Shaafi'. This is how you make a duwa. Praising Allah with His names and attributes with similarities of your duwas.
8. Do not ever supplicate to anyone else but Allah. You cannot do that. It's shirk. Asking and making duwa to any supernatural being, dead human or a grave is prohibited in Islam.
9. Supplicate for yourself first and then for others. 
10. Do not have the habit of asking others to pray for you and you stop praying for yourself. Sure they can make duwa for you but only a person who really wants forgiveness from Allah and who would understand the intensity of that urge is only you, not others. 

THE TIME OF ACCEPTANCE OF SUPPLICATION:

• between the Adhan and Iqamah [Al-Hakim 2: 114, and Abu Dawud #2540, ibn Majah]
• at the time of tahajjud (last third of the night)
• qayam ul layl (late at night) [Sahih Muslim-757]
• at the end of obligatory prayers (after At-tahyat and before tasleem) [At-Tirmidhi]
• a specific time on Friday [Sahih Al Bukhari]
• in prostration [Sahih Muslim, Abu Dawud, An-Nasa'i and others, Sahih al-Jami #1175] 
• at the time of pre-dawn meal (Suhur) and breaking of fast 
• during fasting [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi - Hasan] 
• the night of Power and destiny [Surah al-Qadr, 97: 3]
• while travelling [At-Tirmidhi, Sahih]
• on the day of Arafat. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: 'The best supplication is the supplication on the day of Arafat'.  [At-Tirmidhi and Malik] 
• when drinking Zamzam water [Reference: Ahmad 3: 357 and Ibn Majah #3062]
• in the battlefield [Abu Dawud-2540, ibn Majah, al-Hakim]
• when it is raining [Al-Hakim 2: 114, and Abu Dawud #2540, ibn Majah]

ACCEPTANCE OF DUWA BY CERTAIN PEOPLE:

• duwa of a just ruler [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi - Hasan] 
• duwa of a sick person [Sahih Muslim -2126, At-Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud]
• duwa of a parent for his/her children [At-Tirmidhi - Sahih] 
• duwa of an obedient children for their parents [Sahih al-Bukhari 3:36, 472] 
• duwa of an oppressed person [Sahih Al-Bukhari and Muslim, Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi - Hasan] 
• duwa of a fasting person [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi - Hasan]
• duwa of a traveler [At-Tirmidhi, Sahih]
• duwa of a Muslim for his absent sibling or friend [Sahih Muslim]
• duwa of people after death of a person [Muslim, abu Dawud, Ahmad] 
• duwa made by a group of people invoking and supplicating to Allah Az Wajal. [Sahih Muslim]
• duwa of Surah Fatihah by saying Ameen [Sahih al-Bukhari -780, Sahih Al-Muslim-410]

PLACES OF ACCEPTANCE OF DUWAS:

• duwa after stoning in Jamarat at Hajj [Sahih al-Bukhari -1753]
• duwa inside the Kabah  [Sahih Al-Muslim 2: 968]
• duwa at Mount Safa or Mount Marwa in Umrah or Hajj [Sahih Al-Muslim -1218]
• duwa at any of the holy places in Islam

O Our Rabb! Accept from us (our duwa). Indeed You, You are the Always All Hearing and the Always All Knowing

                                  

I have given references for almost every point. Please read those hadiths for more clarification and confirmation. The post would be too long if I posted every proof or evidence. If you want to read all the hadiths, please visit here

JazakumuaAllah hu khairan for reading. Don't forget to rate, share and comment.

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Thank you for reading. Please feel free to send me the link of your blogs and comment below if you have similar views. 
- Manal Mirza

GIVE GIFTS AND GAIN LOVE

 A gift is a token of appreciation and love that you have for one another that you express it by giving gifts. Money shouldn't be made into a big issue when you want to surprise someone with a gift.

Every one of us should present our families, relative and friends once in a while with at least a simple gift. Doesn't matter how expensive or how extravagant the gift is. What matters is your intention to please your Rabb and make the latter happy and let them know that you care!
Hand made gifts are the most thoughtful presents of all. Most of us can't deny the fact that how kind and thoughtful they seem to be. If you can't afford to buy present, why don't we just make them? :D :D
There are several occasions or days when we happen to gift someone like Birthdays, Weddings, Anniversaries, Eid or Graduations etc. These are the formality type of gifts that the occasion demands off. 
But giving someone a gift should never have a particular reason. Gifts can be give at any time of the year and at any time of the day and as many times a possible. 
But there is something even better than this. 
Narrtaed by Aisha RadiaAllah Anha: Allah's Messenger Sallalahu alaihi wasallam used to accept gifts and give something in return. [Book of Gifts, Sahih Bukhari 1160 ]

What a wonderful way to give and take love! Receive gifts but also do return. Some people feel that she/he is only giving me a present because I gave him/her so and become all judgy and fail to appreciate the gift. Let's not find ways to create a fight and fall into the traps of shaitaan.
Please do not be among those who simply love to receive gifts. You are rather creating a civil war in someone's heart or simply being rude! These are not mere rules but these are Akhlaq that our Islam teaches us how to create love in someone's heart to a greater extent. :) 

NO NO's when giving a gift:
1. Do not leave a price tag on the gift. Intentionally or in ignorance. Please DO NOT do this. I have received few gifts in the past that had price tags on them and I really didn't know what it meant or what I was suppose to do with them. It kinda made me feel embarrassed and made me feel a little low towards that person. Please don't show someone how much you spent on them. It could be a silly mistake but be alert for next time.
2. Do not ever boast what you had to go through to buy the present or how branded it was. You either give a gift with respect or don't give it at all. 
3. The worst of all of this is to TAKE BACK the gift. Narrated Ibn Abbas RadiAllah Anhu: The Prophet Sallalahu alaihi Wasallam  said, "One who takes back his gift (which he has already given) is like a dog that swallows its vomits." [Book of Gifts, Sahih Bukhari 1162]

4. Do not expect something in return. Your intention needs to be cleared before you present someone with a gift. You are only doing it to please Allah AzWajal and to make the latter happy. 
5. If you have more than one kid, do not gift only one child and leave the other empty handed. Be just to your kids. This will avoid all the envy and jealousy in the hearts of a sibling for one another. [Reference: Book of Gifts, Sahih Bukhari 1161]
6. Not only the husband but also the wife should gift her husband. It could be anything. Do not sit down and wait for your husband to gift you. Be a bigger and better lover and present him First! :D
7. Give a meaningful and useful present like educational or Islamic books, perfumes, a sweet appreciation letter, a thoughtful dinner etc. Personally, a gift that is not useful to me and is a decor item, I will fail to throw it one day because it wouldn't be of any use to me. A person can only have so much space in their homes. ;) 

NO NO's OF receiving a gift:
1. Do not ever speak little of the gift. 
Abu Hurairah narrated that Allah's Messenger (Sallalahu alaihi Wasallam) said: "O Muslim Women! None of you should look down upon the gift sent by her she-neighbour even if it were the trotters of the sheep (fleshless part of legs)." [Book Of Gifts: 1152 Sahih Bukhari]
2. Make sure you thank them for their effort and praise them but do not go over the top. It will only change their intentions to another destination. 

Jabir bin Abdullah RadiAllah Anhu narrated: The Messenger of Allah said,"Whoever is given a present and has means then he should give something in return and whoever has no means to do so, he should praise him. For whoever praises, he has indeed been grateful to him and whoever conceals it so, indeed he is ungrateful." [Book of Adab, Abu Dawud 4813]
3. Do not ever refuse a gift, may it be anything (if it's a haram item then you can). Specially, do not refuse to a perfume gift. 
Anas RadiAllah Anhu narrated: Allah Messenger Sallalahu alaihi wasallam used not to reject the gifts of perfume." [Book of Gifts Sahih Bukhari 1159]         
                                 
If you have some of your NO NO's in any of those categories, please do mention.

As for now,  JazakumuAllah hu khairan for reading. Do share, comment and rate. 
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LONELY DAYS, NO FRIENDS OR ANYONE WHO CAN UNDERSTAND...

This is what I feel at least once in a month or maybe even more sometimes. This is not a self pity post. This is just to show you what I do when I've lost hope from myself and I feel really down and worthless.  If you do feel like me sometimes, then please bare with me and read... :)
The reason why I feel one of these emotions is when I feel I'm not doing something right in my life or maybe when I feel that no one cares about me. And also because I'm different than most of my peeps around me. Sometimes I don't even know why I'm feeling worthless and extremely unhappy.  Most of the times I feel like this is maybe because I am a very sensitive person from the inside who shows to be really strong from the outside. This show act is really the most difficult part. But that's my personality. I don't like to look or be perceived as weak.
I am not an expert to advice you what to do here since I myself am a victim. But let me tell you something what really helps me and makes me feel a lot better.

                      

Realization: This is the key of the entire root cause. To realize what wrong have you done that you had to face this. Why do I feel this way? Did I upset my Rabb? Did I hurt somebody?  Did I not focus in my prayers today? Did I do proper dhikr today? Did I do my chores and help somebody today or not? Did I feel or speak something bad about a person? Did I complain today? Did I thank Allah?  Have I disappointed someone?
And right after I've answered all of my doubts and spoken to myself, I seek forgiveness from Allah subhaanAllah wa ta'Allah. AstagfiraAllah!
Because yes! I have upset my Rabb, yes I have hurt somebody unintentionally. I did think bad about someone in my heart and even spoken bad about someone. I didn't focus in my prayers like I should have. I didn't help someone today. I kept complaining about silly things when someone else is deprived of that blessing. I didn't thank Allah. And I feel like I deserve all of this.... All the unhappiness and the unease..
The thing is in the end only you can understand yourself more than your friends or family. But your Rabb, Allah understands you the best. SubhaanAllah! We all need to wake our souls to perceive this. So speak to yourself and REALIZE with your true heart. Don't be the one who says, "I haven't done anything. Everyone hurt me. I don't deserve this. Why is this happening to me. Why me?  Why not her?" Please don't say that. Just be patient and figure it out. Even if you were 100% innocent of being unhappy,  remember with every hardship comes ease and this is just a test. So be patient without complaining. I know it's hard. But this is what it is.
Dhikr e ilaahi: Do morning and evening dhikr. If u already do, then increase it with masnoon Quranic duwas. Increase your duration and the rakat of your prayer.. Add nafeel prayers.  Pray tahajjud, fast or even read Qur'an. Sometimes it takes more ibaadat to really feel that connection with your Rabb.
Believe me once you do that, you'll be happy with yourself that at least you're doing something to please your Rabb. Indeed Allah didn't create mankind and jinn except but to worship Him. No wonder that's the only way to real peace and self contentment.  

             
Lower your expectations: Do not expect anything and I repeat,  anything from ANYBODY. (Sorry for the cap locks but that needed to be emphasized) The lesser you expect from people the lesser they'll hurt you. People can't make themselves happy and we expect happiness from them?  What an irony! Trust Allah and expect from Him. He is Ar Raziq. The Provider.
This is all that I do. And if it bother me a lot I speak to one of my close friends.  And letting it out do feels good but that's not the first step you should do.
I hope this helps somebody. May Allah guide us all and forgive all our sins. AMEEN
I pray that Allah cures your heart and make you a better human and a better Muslim. Ameen

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